When I was ten, it first struck me how important God is; the penny dropped, and I realised what God was! Before I thought of him as a great intelligence, a bit like the all-seeing eye in ‘Lord of the Rings’ – not able to see everything at once, but it could be distracted as when Aragorn’s army distracted it away from Frodo and Sam.

I realised that God isn’t like that, but can see everything at once. After that, I carried on as before, but knowing I was sinful and needing a Saviour. I remember finding the services at church boring, and spending the time adding up the hymn numbers, or drawing pictures when I was supposed to be taking notes. At home, I was unkind to my brothers: I would shout at them and hurt them, and not care, but just “say sorry” without meaning it. When my Granny died, I realised that I could also die any day, and nothing could stop that.

At the funeral service and the Bible Study on bereavement soon afterwards, I was struck by what Dad said about Granny being a sinner, but she was forgiven because she repented of her sins and died in faith. This brought me face-to-face with my fear and convinced me of the truth. When I felt true conviction about my sins, I knew I had to do something about them – I had to put my sins onto Jesus and leave them behind.

I already knew that to become a Christian I had to believe in the virgin birth; that Jesus lived a perfect life; that He died on the cross; that He rose again on the third day; that He ascended into heaven; and that He is now interceding for us at the right hand side of God. I had known that I should trust in Jesus before, but now I put my faith in Him to take away my sins. Now I was able to concentrate on the services far better, and could learn from the Bible being expounded. Over the last year I have had the strength to learn more than in my whole life so far: I can read devotionals without being itchy to finish quickly; I enjoy communion with people at church without having to force myself to talk to them; and I have made friends with older people that I never spoke to before.

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The ability to pray from the heart would not be possible without the LORD; before God helped me, I could not concentrate properly while praying – I would fidget, think of other things and be distracted easily. Now I can concentrate and pray what I feel, while also listening properly to other people’s prayers and being encouraged by them. I have found the last few months have been especially helpful: my introduction to the “Pilgrim Devotions” has helped me through the bible – it has “easy to follow” explanations that have helped me understand the bible in a new way. I have been strengthened by God plentifully. I now really enjoy helping with the recordings in the church, and future, I would like to do further work in the Church for the glory of God.

Try God.

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