My Marriage Story

My Marriage Story

Years ago, while I was in graduate school, I met the man that I wanted to marry.  He was somebody who was everything that I could ever imagine I wanted.   We had the same cultural background; he was a strong Christian (supposedly) and came from a strong Christian family.  I ended up getting into a relationship with him for about 7 years, but it was a horrible, terrible, bad relationship. I would say that we brought out the worst in each other but from the way he talked about past relationships I could tell that he’d always been the type of person he was with me even when he was in relationships with other people.  About 7 years into the relationship he got married to somebody else behind my back. It took a few months for me to find out what happened and when I did I was completely devastated.  I was hurt, I was disappointed, and I felt hopeless because I was already at an age where people were starting to get concerned as to why I wasn’t yet married. I entered into a severe depression for a few years that was only exacerbated by family members, friends and coworkers constantly commenting on me not being married, making jokes that were so hurtful about me being single and

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Overcoming Social Fears

Overcoming Social Fears

Before I came to know Christ, my life was filled with fear, with social fears being the strongest. As far back as I can remember I was uncomfortable around people. I grew up in a small house with my parents and four sisters but most of my memories were of being alone or feeling alone. Relationships were painful, superficial and disappointing. Growing up I felt unlovable, ugly, stupid and insignificant. Picture Archie and Edith Bunker of All in the Family then you can see my parents. My father was physically abusive with my mom and oldest sister several times and verbally abusive with me on a regular basis. There weren’t any rules or discipline, just a lot of yelling. Every day Dad found something to yell about. He would yell if there was hair in the bathtub if there was lint on the carpet after vacuuming or a dirty glass in a clean sink. You couldn’t have a difference of opinion without being ridiculed. It was very rare to get a compliment. Things I said or did to be helpful weren’t good enough so I learned to keep my mouth shut and stay out of the way to avoid getting hit. One day in particular I was watching a Loretta Young movie where she played a nun. She said and

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