I am here to share my story with you on how I recommitted my life to Christ. I’m going to start with where I was the most troubled in my life. Not too long ago I was going through depression and bad anxiety. I felt as if no one cared or acknowledged me, at home and school. I got so bad to the point where I was thinking of ending everything. But I knew if I did that then the ones I cared for would suffer much more pain than I would imagine. Especially my mom for it was her that I kept thinking that if I was to ever do it I would make her suffer and impact her mental health. I love my mother more than anyone on the earth.
I knew not to do it, at the time I knew of Jesus Christ and some things he did, I believed and I knew that if I were to end my life, what I would face if it was to ever happen. I also knew that I was way too young to even think about doing such things. But I was in a bad mental and was scared to speak up and tell someone. I didn’t have any friends who were reliable enough to speak up about things like this. And was scared of what they think and what my family will think of me. The only one who knew at first was my mother because she noticed that my mood and personality were different, so soon after she realized, I now finally realized that my whole family noticed it too.
But soon after I made some friends that weren’t the best and I did something that I never thought I’d ever do, I sinned. And the worst part is that I felt guilty for doing so, but at the time I was in the dark for too long that I continued. Until I found out what could happen if I were to keep going down this path. When I was sinning, I was in therapy I knew that I shouldn’t be doing those things. It bothered me so much and my anxiety had just spiked and surpassed my depression. To the point where I wasn’t as sad anymore but I was so anxious about what I was going to do and how I was going to tell my mom what I’d done. And still to this day, I haven’t told her but as I’m writing this, I’m going to tell her what I did in that period I was in. The things I did were not ok and I felt the guilt that covered me, I knew that I needed to change.
And with that, I stopped doing the things that led me to sin. I cut off people I knew were hard to remove it took some time but I didn’t want the cycle to repeat itself. I had to grow my relationship with Jesus again because without him I would still struggle to sleep, and fight depression and anxiety. I would have still sinned, and many other things, but when I started to see more videos and people talking about what Jesus had done and all the great things he’s done. I knew that this time I was making sure that I knew Jesus Christ and what he’s done and not just know the ins and outs of the Bible, but to know truly Jesus. And better my relationship with him as I had when I was a kid and felt no shame and hate in my life but was full of his love and happiness and respect for everyone. I want to go back and be how I was before I was sinning.
But the good thing about having Jesus by your side is that even if you felt how I did, that no one loved you or liked you, Jesus Christ is way more than enough for you and his love and his happiness will fill that void. He will make you feel like the happiest person in the world because he loves you so very much that he died, and gave his life for our sins so that we would become believers in him and our sins would be forgiven. The more I learn about him every day I grow and apply every single teaching he has to my life to change and better myself.
I also am working on getting my family to get out of such a toxic state and seek and believe in Jesus Christ just as I am doing the same. For those out there reading my story, I love y’all but Jesus loves you more. Have a good rest of your day or night.
Also Read:
Devotional
Purpose: Created to Raise and Repress
Inspirational
A Surprise Lesson from Squeezing an Orange
Testimonies
The Holy Spirit Touched The Hearts Of The Check-In Staff
God, The Source Of All Comfort
