I gave my life to Jesus at age 6 at a VBS. I drifted from God in high school. I got a Depo Provera birth control shot at age 17 and I had a bad side effect of anxiety and paranoia. I didn’t get any treatment, I just never got one again.
I went to college and in my sophomore year, I was searching for truth and meaning in life. I met a pastor who shared his journey with Jesus and through this encounter, I decided to re-dedicate my life to Jesus. I struggled on and off with depression. People at my church encouraged me to trust God/pray/ resist the devil/worship/know who I am in Christ.
I survived ok this way until after graduation. Then, my friends were scattered and I drifted away from God. I got into doing drugs, went dancing a lot, and got raped by a man who put roofies on my drink.
I struggled with depression severely during this time and was diagnosed with bipolar. A group of friends went to a concert, I blacked out and woke up with a girl. We fell in love. Unfortunately, she was a crack addict.
I left her after 8 months and she stole money from me. After 2 years, I wanted Jesus again. I followed Jesus and enjoyed a wonderful time worshipping God, enjoying His presence, and healing from the past.
After 4 years, I had a complete emotional breakdown. I had gotten caught up in doing so much for God and didn’t know how to deal with all the suffering I witnessed at the homeless shelter I worked at. I left God for 7 years and just did my own thing.
I finally came back to Jesus in 2014. It’s been 10 years, and I want to follow God forever. I’ve been off psychiatric medication for 14 years; it is a miracle!
Things that have helped:
- Changing my inner beliefs, for example, instead of believing I’m not good enough, I believe I can do all things through Christ, has strengthened me. I am amazing the way I am, even on the journey to grow and change. It’s a daily journey to keep renewing my mind.
- Eating fairly healthy, eating when hungry, and not paying any attention to all the weight loss pressure.
- Taking a homoeopathic remedy for emotional balance.
- Taking care of myself.
- Living a lifestyle of encouraging and loving others.
- Taking parts of the Bible and just trusting God with the parts that are hard to understand or accept.
- I’m married to a wonderful man. I’m still attracted to women; I just choose to stay true to my husband. In some churches, I just don’t always take what they say in. Extreme people, I just let them be themselves without taking what they say personally.
I still sometimes struggle emotionally, but overall, I’m grateful and have a wonderful life homeschooling my 3 children.
Also Read:
Devotional
Nehemiah’s Leadership Playbook: Advocacy
Inspirational
Voice Like His
Testimonies
My Personal Journey to Revelation Knowledge
